HOWEVER, EXCEPT FOR THE SEX, TODAY JOAN WOULD OF LOVED TO BE IN , "IT'S COMPLICATED"!

AND PROBABLY GOT IN A GOOD LAUGH OR TWO WATCHING,"THE MOTHER'S IN LAW' , TO SEE HER FRIEND AND "MILDRED PIERCE" CO-STAR, EVE ARDEN.

AND HAD A FAMOUS LACERATION ON 'THE LUCY SHOW'!

BUT AS WE ALL ALL KNOW , SHE REALLY SHINED IN ,"NIGHT GALLERY'!

AND SHE WOULD WATCH 'DARK SHADOWS' TO CATCH A PERFORMANCE BY HER OLD FRIEND, THE OTHER JOAN , BENNETT THAT IS.

AND SHE WAS SET TO APPEAR ON A ' THE NAME OF THE GAME', IN SOMETHING CALLED LIKE , 'EXECUTIVE ORDER 1971' BUT ACCORDING TO A VERY RELIABLE SOURCE [ SEE COMMENTS] IT DIDN'T QUITE WORK OUT THAT WAY...CHECK OUT THE COMMENT SYMBOL!

AFTER 'MEDICAL CENTER' , JOAN CALLED IT A NIGHT, SHE USED TO INSIST THAT SHE HAD BE HOME AT A CERTAIN TIME OR SHE WOULD MISS HER FAVORITE TELEVISION PROGRAMS.

ON A PERSONAL NOTE , THIS IS MY FAVORITE TELEVISION THEME OF ALL TIME...JOAN LIKED IT TOO, BEING FRIENDS WITH NATALIE [WOOD] AND RJ [ ROBERT WAGNER] , IN CASE YOU DON'T KNOW.

JOAN PROBABLY WATCHED"5-O" AS WELL.

ALL I CAN SAY IS,"OMFG!'

HERE'S A DUSTY LITTLE CURIOUSITY...

THIS WAS MY FAVORITE INTRO

METHINKS THIS WAS ONE OF JOAN'S FAVORITE TELEVISION PROGRAMS

WHAT HOLIDAY THEMED BLOG WOULD BE COMPLETE WITHOUT THIS HISTORIC RECORDING?

SEEMS TO ME THAT CAPUCINE INSPIRED JC WITH HER GLAMOROUS LOOK...

FROM THE FILM,'WALK ON THE WILD SIDE'..VERY COOL!

CAPUCINE AND BARBARA STANWYCK, YOU DO THE MATH...

OR PERHAPS THE MAGNIFICENT, CAPUCINE, OH CAPUCINE!

DOLORES GRAY LOOKS LIKE THE INSPIRATION FOR THE 'THIERRY MUGLAR WOMAN'!

WHAT A LUSH, RICH CADILLAC OF A SONG, AS INTERPUTTED BY THAT DIVINE DOLORES GRAY...

THAT FANTABULOUS DOLORES GRAY!

ENJOY!

THIS PERKED ME UP A BIT AS I HAVE BEEN A BIT SLEEPY AS OF LATE.

I DISCOVERED DOLORES GRAY IN 'DESIGNING WOMAN' AND SHE AND IT ARE FABULOUS!

AND ON THE SUBJECT OF THE OPPOSITE SEX, LET ME INTRODUCE YOU TO THE ONE AND ONLY, DOLORES GRAY!

ONE CAN IMAGINE JOAN AS, 'CRAWFORD' BAMBOOZLEING AN ENTRANCE INTO AN UPPER CRUST HOLLYWOOD PARTY , WEARING A GOWN THAT ANNOUNCES HER ARRIVAL FROM ONE END OF THE BALLROOM TO THE OTHER!

THIS NUMBER SEEMS VERY 'NEW YEARS EVEISH', I THINK JOAN WOULD OF APPROVED OF THIS CLIP AS WELL.

FEELING FESTIVE..DOING THE TOWN!

THE ICON AT HER ZENITH!

CHRISTMAS , SIXTY YEARS AGO , 1949

BLESSED JOAN CRAWFORD OPENING PRESENTS!

WISHING YOU ALL THE MERRIEST OF CHRISTMASES!

DORIS DAY IN PRIME FORM AND WE WILL NOT SEE ANOTHER GIANT TALENT LIKE THIS, EVER!

AND WHAT HOLIDAY THEME WOULD BE COMPLETE WITHOUT THE GREAT DORIS DAY!

KEEPING IN THE HOLIDAY SPIRIT...ANDY WILLIAMS AND HIS BROTHERS DUEL WITH OSMOND BROTHERS...TALK ABOUT NOSTALGIC!

SHE IS A PURE DIVA!

MORE OF THE WEIRD!

I COULDN'T AGREE LESS!

SO , SO WRONG!

MORE OF THIS THEME...

THIS SPEAKS FOR ITSELF! WOW!

I WONDER IF JOAN WOULD OF ENJOYED PRODUCING INDUSTRIAL ETTIQUETTE FILMS...HMMM.

I WANT THIS REFRIGERATOR FOR CHRISTMAS...ALL OF THEM!

CHRISTMAS AND AUNTIE MAME, A MOST WINNING COMBiNATION!

BY NOW , DEAR READERS, YOU ARE WELL AQUAINTED WITH MY LOVE OF THE WEIRD AND OBSCURE, BUT NOTHING PREPARED ME FOR THIS!

A WONDERFUL REMIX OF JOAN'S FILMS AND A CHRISTMAS SONG...A REAL TREAT!

A VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS FROM JOAN AND HER HOLLYWOOD FRIENDS

BUT WAIT, THERE IS MORE!

WHAT WOULD THE WINTER SEASON BE WITHOUT...UH...SEVERAL FUR COATS TO MODEL.

THIS IS SANTA JOAN, BOY THAT BEARD WAS ITCHY!

HAPPY HOLIDAYS TO YOU ALL FROM THE JOAN CRAWFORD DELUXE SUITE!

I BELIEVE THIS WAS ON THAT FAB GOODYEAR TIRE CHRISTMAS ALBUM, A LIL' OL' CONFESSION, THIS IS MY FAVORITE XMAS SONG FROM THE SWINGING SIXTIES!

THE ONE, THE ONLY...MISS EYDIE GORME!

SO IMAGINE JOAN AT HOME AT THE PEPSI PENTHOUSE, CHRISTMAS '66 , A COLD DRINK WITH STEVE AND EYDIE!

I KNOW I HARDLY MENTION CLARK , BUT THIS CAUGHT ME COMPLETELY BY SUPRISE, I THINK IT IS CHARMING AND YOU DO NOT HAVE TO BE A BRAIN SURGEON TO SEE THAT THOSE TWO, ARE LIKE CRAZY ABOUT EACH OTHER!

HOW IS THIS FOR JUST PLAIN WONDERFUL WEIRD!

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OH TO HAVE JOAN CRAWFORD ON YOUR SIDE. THE WOMAN REALLY COULD KEEP THOSE MEAN BASTARDS IN LINE!

JOAN REGRETTED MAKING,'THIS WOMAN IS DANGEROUS', WHAT A TITLE, BUT I LOVE THIS SCENE.

I MUST CONFESS, AS MUCH AS I DISPISE THAT CHRISTINA CREATURE, THE FILM ,'MOMMIE DEAREST', IS ONE OF THE FUNNIEST HORROR FILMS I HAVE EVER SEEN. THIS IS A LINE THAT WORKS WELL IN REAL LIFE!

IMAGINE HARRIET CRAIG AS A MUSICAL!

DO NOT MAKE MISS CRAWFORD MAD AT YOUR CLUMSY MISTAKES, ESPECIALLY CONCERNING HER COFFEE SERVICE!

THIS DELIGHTFUL TRAILER FROM ANOTHER TIME AND ANOTHER PLACE, THIS TRAILER SHOWCASES CRAWFORD, MGM AND THAT DRESS!

THIS PERRENIAL HOLIDAY CLASSIC INSPIRES THIS THOUGHT,"WHY DIDN'T JOANIE DO A HOLIDAY FILM?", EVEN BETTE DAVIS DID ONE!

DEAR JOAN WOULD HAVE HIGHLY APPROVED OF THIS CATCHY LITTLE TUNE, AS SHE WAS AN ACTIVE MEMBER OF THE USO!

OF COURSE IT WAS PART OF JOAN'S CHARACTER TO DESIRE THE ADMIRING AND CHARGED ENGERIES OF THE VIRILE MALE ANIMAL, ALWAYS AN EMBRACE AWAY.

TAKE A GANDER OF LA CRAWFORD IN ADRIAN'S STUNNING GLASS BEADED MASTERPIECE!

I CAN JUST IMAGINE JOAN CRAWFORD CREATING A SPARKLING DREAMGIRLS TRIO MAYBE WEARING GOWNS BASED ON THIS DESIGN...

THE GLAMOUR, THE SPARKLE, THE GROOVE, THE TALENT...HOW COULD JOAN NOT BE A FAN OF DIANA ROSS AND THE SUPREMES?

WITH A FAIR THEE WELL AND HEY NONY NON, WE SAY , "ADEIU', TO OUR SHIZ TZU FRIENDS.

LET US VISIT WITH MORE OF FEI-FEI...

YOU KNOW, MISS C LOVED HER LITTLE SHIH TZU, "PRINCESS', SO HERE IS A SAMPLING OF THE SHIH TZU PORTION OF THE JOAN CRAWFORD DELUXE SUITE...

LAUREN BACALL IS VERY JOAN, TAKE A GANDER AT HER CHANTUESSEING SKILLS...

WHICH REMINDS ME...SPEAKING OF LANA TURNER...THIS IS A PROPER OPENING CREDIT SEQUENCE, FIT FOR HOLLYWOOD ROYALTY!

THE PERFECT HOSTESS, OUR DEAR CONSTANCE BENNETT, INTRODUCES LANA TURNER TO THE'IN' CROWD.

AND NOW A VISIT FROM OUR GOOD FRIEND, THE GREAT CONSTANCE BENNETT

A FINAL WORD FROM THE JOAN CRAWFORD CLINIC

NOT TO BE CONFUSED WITH THE BETTY FORD CLINIC...

AND TO CAP IT OFF...

HAVE ANOTHER!

LETS NOT BE TOO HARD ON THE PARTYING, SWEETIE DARLINGS!

SHE IS NOT ALONE, HERE IS ELIZABETH TAYOR BOMBED AT AN AWARD SHOW,TOO.

BY POPULAR OPINION , IT SEEMS MOST STAR GAZERS PREFER THEIR ICONS, BOMBED, FUNNY AND UNPREDICTABLE...WITNESS DEAR JOAN ...A BIT DRUNK AND HIGH ON PAINKILLERS!

THIS SONG WAS STUCK IN MY HEAD ONE SUMMER DAY AND I SANG IT ALL DAY, DRIVEING ME AND MY BEST FRIEND, LETICIA, CRAZY!

SERVING UP MORE WONDERFUL MOMENTS, LETS TAKE A WALK WITH JOAN THROUGH A HAUNTED HOUSE...

MOVING AWAY FROM CRAZY TANGENTS TO WONDERFUL SCENES FROM THE FINE TRADITION OF PLAYING , SHALL WE SAY,"LADIES IN THE DARK?"

LETS PUT A CAP ON IT , ALREADY!

BUT HEY THERE IS ONLY ONE TRUE QUEEN OF HOLLYWOOD, ENJOY HER IN THIS DEMENTED LIL"O" GOOFY MONTAGE.

AND BY "HER", OF COURSE I MEAN, MISS JOAN CRAWFORD!
!

AND FOR FUN

FOR COMPARISION..

ONE OF TOBY'S OFF SUBJECT TIE INS

AND NOW FOR A FASHION MOMENT

MORE FROM OUR IMAGINARY TV SPONORS...

AND JUST THINK OF JOAN CRAWFORD HER AND ..UH..LIP INPRINT...

I THINK MISS JOAN WOULD OF LOVED THIS BULGARI COMMERCIAL...

HERE IS A TASTE OF THE,"I LOVE LUCY CHRISTMAS SPECIAL'...

AND TO ILLUSTRATE MY POINT, LET ME INTRODUCE YOU TO THE STEELE FAMILY, JOAN, ALFRED, CATHY AND CINDY. TINA AND CHRIS ARE AWAY...AT BOARDING SCHOOL.

I CAN SEE MRS ALFRED STEELE, THE QUEEN OF PEPSI COLA AND HER FAMILY, ENJOYING AN ICE COLD PEPSI, WITH 100 PROOF VODKA, FOR MISS CRAWFORD, CURLING UP TO THE 'I LOVE LUCY CHRISTMAS SPECIAL' AND WISHING THIS WAS ONE OF THE COMMERCIALS INTERRUPTING THE BROADCAST...